Has Texting Created a New Generation Gap Between Parents, Kids?

Getting my daughter to answer her cell phone almost always results in getting sent straight to her obnoxious voice mail with Lady Gaga screaming back at me.

But send her a text and I get a response within 30 seconds flat. What I receive, though, is a jumble of characters and jargon that I don’t understand. Such as “ttyad” for talk to you after dinner or “hk” for hugs and kisses or “idk” for I don’t know.

There is something greatly missed when a human voice is replaced by a buzz on my cell phone.

As technology becomes more advanced, real-time, portable and integrated, a rift between parents and kids is created. Plain and simple, the skills of basic communication becoming obsolete. 

Cyber slang and acronyms are replacing the inherent need for real conversation and human interaction.

As this generation cultivates an encrypted language understood by their peers exclusively, parents are less in tune with who and what their kids are involved in; in essence , they are cut out. On the other hand, for some families, the availability of fast, non-verbal communication aids in keeping tabs on the kids. It can have its place if monitored carefully.

Where Internet-speak began as way to speed up communication and lessen keystrokes, it also became a way to hide the use of drugs, alcohol and sexual engagement. Kids are creating their own verbiage to intentionally keep adults in the dark.

This is not just limited to cell phones, but also applies to online chat rooms, social media sites and email. The slang “airhead” and “dinkie dow” may indicate marijuana use. The abbreviation “g2gpc” is a quick note indicating got to go parents coming.

It is my opinion this new mode of interaction will be a detriment to their social skills. As these kids enter into adulthood and into the workforce and mature relationships they will be at a disadvantage. True communication is not just words; it is body language, voice inflection and the way we carry ourselves.

Dr. Lori Puterbaugh of Largo, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Licensed Mental Health Counselor (also known as Dr. Lori on Spirit FM radio) explained:

“Our ability to communicate is limited by our vocabulary.  This is why there is a growing trend to teach sign language to babies; their ability to communicate via sign language exceeds their verbal ability for a long time.  Electronic communications often rely on abbreviated means of communication. Imagine the difference between texting, ‘I’m lonely’ versus having the focused attention of someone while you talk about being lonely.”

Tara Ryan-Legowski of Bradenton and mother of 13-year-old and 16-year-old teenagers said, “My kids’ generation doesn’t talk anymore. Everything they do is on a keyboard or online.  Their laughs, fights, struggles, make-ups and break-ups are all typed out instead of spoken.”

Ann Marie Cash, a social networker herself, sees the glass half-full. If not for the Internet and Facebook, Cash said she would not always be able to keep up with her grown sons and their kids. "When I can't find out something or don't hear from them, I'll leave a note on their Facebook page. It's a great way to embarrass but in a loving way," she said, chuckling.

My parents always knew who we are talking to and they usually could hear our conversations in full. When I was younger, there were two phones in our household, one in the kitchen attached to a wall and the other in my parents’ bedroom. Both with spiraling phone cords that limited distance.

Any chance for privacy meant huddling down under the kitchen counter and cupping my hand over the phone. When cordless phones became the standard, it was a new found freedom to be able to walk to another room. 

It’s more challenging today with mobile devices to have this open awareness. It is recommended that parents take away cell phones at bedtime, even for older teenagers as a general household rule. Some mobile carriers may provide a history of text dialogue by request.

As technology changes it affects the way people communicate. But basic communication and interpersonal skills should not go to the way side. It’s important for parents to embrace change but also instill core values and skills to their children and have a role in monitoring the use of technology for their families.

There are several resources online to help parents encrypt internet slang such as noslang.com. You can enter in terms to decode or access a compiled alphabetic list of current slang and acronyms and their meanings.

For more information on Dr. Puterbaugh and her services, visitwww.balancedlifestylecoaching.com.